Original article from Kent Live
Our beautiful county is well known across the land for having the very best seaside destinations.
Thousands of holidaymakers will flock to our coastal towns for their summer staycations as we hopefully emerge from the pandemic.
But this same enthusiasm isn't always shared by the people who actually live in these places, who haven't been quite as taken by the array of attractions we have on offer.
Much of this frustration with the place they call home has been vented on the site ILiveHere.
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ILiveHere is a website where local residents take brutal digs and swipes at their hometown – all in the name of satire.
Pretty much every town from west Kent to east Kent has at least one scathing review.
How the resident described it: “Dymchurch a.k.a Grimchurch”
“Awful Youths, Awful Schools, Rains 24/7 and when it doesn’t overrun with cockneys”
“As a youth having grown up in this geriatric landfill I can say to any young family looking to move here, simply, do not.”
What it’s really like: Anyone who has spent any time in Kent as a kid will tell you about The Romney Hythe and Dymchurch – it’s really great fun.
The area does get a lot of tourists in the summer, but like most coastal towns in Kent, those tourists help keep businesses open and give the town a buzz.
It’s a typical British seaside town and a lot nicer than this resident makes it out to be.
How the resident described it: “The town may offer free spontaneous sparring sessions between the hours of 9pm and 4am weekends and at most venues weekdays before midnight.
“it is the one place you can be sure to bury your head, away from the successes of the rest of the world.”
“And if you say hello to someone at breakfast, you’ve assaulted them by dinner.”
What it’s really like: I’m not quite sure which part of Herne Bay this resident lives in, but it can’t be the same parts I’ve seen.
The pier is one of the most famous in Kent and supported by an attractive promenade, the seafront in Herne Bay is a place you can take all the family.
With the reculver towers just a mile down the road, it’s a popular spot for tourists who enjoy visiting the area – despite what the resident says. The niche shops on the high-street help give the town a very personal feel.
How the resident described it : “With pubs and small pointless shops scattered all over the fish smelling, narrow high street; this town is a treat.”
“Why not come to Whitstable to get drunk, smell of fish, and nearly get in 5 fights because you farted? Great little town!”
“Getting some form of drug down here is easier than getting something to eat. Why is this you ask? Because most shops shut at around 9, and on a Sunday it’s pretty much medieval.”
What it’s really like: Whitstable has grown a reputation for being one of the most trendy towns outside London.
"With it’s gorgeous seafront bars and quintessential shops, it appeals to all ages
"The pubs and restaurants make it popular in the summer and with good transport links it really is one of the hotspots in Kent."
How the resident described it: "Thanet has managed to attract the lions share of the country’s unemployed, be they in training, wannabes or fully fledged.
"You would be advised to avoid being in public during the afternoon and twilight hours as this seems to the natural congregating hours for them.
What it’s really like: Thanet is home to glorious beaches spanning large parts of its coastline.
With Michelin star restaurants and plenty of activities for the kids to enjoy, it’s one of the most popular areas in the county.
The Turner Centre, Dreamland, Folk Week and the biggest Wetherspoons in the UK mean there is always stuff happening in the east of the county.
Just what is this person on about?
How the resident described it: “Open Drug dealing is normally expected in Dover. Crack and smack are easier to find than a good restaurant”
“Any nice places to walk or enjoy as we have in the past, are being [allegedly] taken away by English heritage.”
The Down From London (DFL) crowd are just as bad with solicitors letters about noisy sheep, chicken and cows. A fox being shot, got a police officer called out and now they’re making local history up to suit their ideas.
What it’s really like: This resident clearly woke up on the wrong side of the bed that morning.
Dover is full of very quaint micro-pubs and has plenty of cafes in the town.
The white cliffs and Dover castle mean it’s a popular destination with tourists and locals alike.
How the resident described it: “If you don’t have a car and you want to get out of the place back to the mainland, the majesty of one of the great train journeys of the world awaits.
“The air is now clean-ish and the only smell is that of McDonalds and desperation.”
“Sheerness is the end of the line… literally. The end of a small branch line from Sittingbourne to the Isle of Dirt.”
What it’s really like: Despite its critics – Sheerness actually has a lot going for it.
The island has plenty of areas with stunning views and a seafront to die for.
The high-street offers a wide range of items for shoppers and has plenty of life in it.
Sheerness gets a hard time of it, we think that’s unfair.